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Post by bloodwolf on Jul 27, 2006 2:48:21 GMT -5
Part one Redmption
chapter one The young two tailed fox who was once refered to as tails sat alone his back against the hard musty walls of the cold damp cave he had made his offical hide out from the freedom fighters. The fox sat there remenicing about the time when he used to be part of the freedom fighters and all his battles against the late Dr.Eggman a.k.a Robotnik.
He had been a fugitive for nearly a month now and his memories of past time were fading. He had forgotten most of his adventures with sonic, and couldn't remeber what had made sonic the hero he had once held him up as.
The fox could no longer bear the name tails for it haunted him just as everyone did. He decided to revert to his maiden name Miles. His eyes weld up with tears as the fatal image of sonics death flashed before his eyes. He knew what he had done and why he was a fugitive, and he knew he had to do somthing to make it up to everyone.
As he sat there he keep asking himself. "What have I done? What came over me? Will it happen again? Is anyone safe around me?" His life away from his home had hardened him and made him stronger. Stronger then Sonic, shadow, or Knuckles could ever dream of being.
He knew now the power had always been there, but He was always pushed around and his spirit was too crushed to show his true power. That is why he did it. He knew he did what he did because he was tired. Tired of being treated like a child. Tired of being treated like he wasn't there. Above all else he was tired of being Sonic's shadow.
Well he was no longer sonic's shadow, but instead his murderer. He had struck sonic in rage and ended him in envy. Two crimes that were unforgivable the young miles thought, but he wasn't one to give up and he knew he would find away to redeem himself. Even if it meant going into the the forbidden zone and destroying Shadic himself.
Miles was a smart kid and knew if he went now he wouls die, but he had to train and become stronger before he dared challenge Shadic. So Miles decided first thing in the mourning he would leave the cave and head into the great forest. For he heard that many powerful creatures lay there and that would be the best place to train.
So After making up his mind Miles closed his eyes and rested, but because of the guilt and pain of sonic's death he never truly got rest rather just a moment were time flew away instead of beating and mocking him. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __ _ __ _ __ _ _ __ _ _ __ _ __ _ _ __
I'll add more later hope ya like it.
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Post by S-wo on Jul 30, 2006 17:50:13 GMT -5
I like it good job ;D
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Post by bloodwolf on Jul 30, 2006 23:25:22 GMT -5
thanks I got alittle more ready but it aint close to bein finished
chapter two Miles awoke as the sun rose and its light hit his eyes tempoarily blinding the fox as he had grow used to the darkness of the cave. He knew he would finally have to leave and his destination was going to be the great forest.
As Miles left the exit of the cave he eyes grasped the trees that stood tall and firm and the spring that ran beside them sparkled as the sun's light hit its surface. Miles was awed by the wonderful site for he had been in the cavce far too long and the outside seemed almost brand new.
Miles quickly caught hold of himself and began to head towards the great forest. He had been away for awhile and had forgotten the path to the forest, but he knew he had to find it. He just had to. It was his only way of making amends for his action.
Miles figured it had been a month and by now perhaps there were a few who had forgotten him. Due to this Miles decided to ask the nearest person for directions. Miles didn't waste anytime he hit the road as fast as he could, his eyes open for any travelors near by.
After an hour of running he finally came across a travelor, but to his dismay it was Antoine. Miles knew he couldn't confront Antoine it would be suicide. Antoine was had a large role with the freedom fighters, and Miles couldn't afford to be caught. Miles became scared if Antoine seen him he wouldn't be able to redeem himself. Then Miles froze in terror as he relized Antoine had spotted him.
Miles was scared he didn't know what to do. If he ran Antoine would send an entire squadrin of freedom fighters after him, and if he stayed the memories would snap him. Antoine noticing Miles walked over to confront him. In his high and mighty tone he said to Miles " Tails, murderer what are you thinking showing your face in Mobius again?" Miles was confused by Antoine's tone it seemed like he was warning him rather then trying to aprehend him. "Quickly Tails go. Leave Mobius before they find you." Antoine demended, but Miles held his ground
" I cant Antoine. I just cant. Not until I have redeemed myself." Antoine looked at Miles and saw the guilt, confusion and torture in his eyes and felt pity for him. " Ok Tails but there is no way you can travel around Mobius in the open like this. it is too dangerous"
Miles looked at Antoine releved that he still had an ally. " Dont call me Tails Antoine I dropped that name it had to many bad memories. My new name is Miles." Antoine looked at Miles in an understanding way And replied " Very well then "Miles" how do you purpose we get you around undetected?" Miles hadn't thought about that and he froze " I..I.. hadn't really thought about that." Miles informed Antoine laughing alittle and rubbing the back of his head. Antoine looked at Miles and said "I think I know a way"
(warning unless you have read the comics you wont know who some of these people are.)
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Post by bloodwolf on Aug 16, 2006 20:23:08 GMT -5
chapter three. Princess Sally had left the forest because she wanted to know what was taking Antoine so long. All she had asked him to do was to look for danger, but that had been hours ago. "What is taking him so long" She wondered to herself.
"There you are Antoine" Sally called noticing him from a distance. "What took you so long I was getting worried." Antoine looked at her and stated " I got caught up helping an old friend." He moved his head gesturing to the small fellow in the black robe following him.
Sally paused for a moment looking at the small fellow wearing the black robe. "He looks familiar. I think I might have met him before." Antoine keeping his cool informed her " I would be most unlikely. you see my friend isn't from around these parts and is only visiting."
"I don’t know" Sally said in a slightly suspicious tone. He looks awfully familiar. " Could you remove your hood please?" Sally asked the small fellow in the black robe. He looked at her for a moment then pulled back the hood reviling a yellow fox with a single tail.
"Hmm I coulda sworn I had seen that fellow before. Oh well" Sally said slightly disappointed at being wrong. Then she turned and headed back to the forest. "I hope Miles is doing ok" Antoine thought to himself then headed towards the forest himself.
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Post by bloodwolf on Sept 3, 2006 6:32:57 GMT -5
chapter four Miles eyes lit up with fascination and awe as he gazed down upon the beauty of the trees and creatures below him. "I've been in that cave so long I have forgotten how beautiful the outside world is" Thought the young Miles to himself. "If I redeem myself the first thing I am doing is creating a sunroof for my home" murmured to himself then continued towards the great forest.
After a few minutes of flying Miles' tails began to tire so he had to land. He landed in the middle of a large mass of trees from the looks of it Miles was probably in the middle of some woods somewhere. Miles removed the map Antoine had given him and opened it. "Hmm thats strange" the young fox thought. "these woods aren't on the map. I might as well look around since my Tails are still tired" With that said Miles returned Antoine's map and began to head into the woods.
"Wow look at these trees!!!!" Miles thought to himself "They must have been around for centuries there huge." Miles began to observe his surroundings. The trees were all as big as skyscrapers it seemed spanning endlessly towards the sky. the ground felt soft and comfortable under his feet and the very essence of the woods made him feel relaxed. "I think I wouldn't mind living here" Miles thought to himself but quickly grabbed ahold of himself and continued to look around.
After a few captivating moments Miles regained self-control and continued his exploration of the woods. A few moments later he came upon a clearing and in it sat a log cabin. Miles ran over to the cabin in hopes he could rest there. Then he froze as he read the sign on the door "Welcome to the Miles Prower residence.
"That cant be the young fox thought to himself. I would remember such a nice home. Miles decided to investigate to find out who the owner of the home was. Then again he froze for when he entered the home he found that on the ground laid two young foxes fast asleep one was dark orange with blue eyes and one tail. The other was red with grey eyes and a single tail. From the looks of it they were probably about 4 years old. Standing above them was a female fox who was bright orange with beautiful blue eyes and a single tail. Standing next to her was Miles himself only this Miles was taller.
"Is he.... he m..me . He cant be he just cant Im standing right here. How can I be here and there?" said the young Miles in confusion. Miles then enters the room slowly and approaches the family.. his family closely, but they seem to not realize he is there. "Maybe maybe this is a bad dream". "This is no dream Miles Prower" came a mysterious voice from behind him.
"Whos there" questioned the young fox. "Who I am is of little importance" came the voices response "What is important is you see what I am to show you." Said the voice. "Very well then what is it you want me to see?" Miles told the voice.
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Post by S-wo on Oct 10, 2006 8:03:06 GMT -5
these three chapters flow pretty well together. You just had a few minor grammical errors. Like you should've added the word he after home, but also you could've just left the quotation marks off since he already made a statement before this one and whenever a character is finished speaking you start a new paragraph. I'm sorry if I'm sounding too much like a perfectionist, I guess it's because I've been spending alot of time at an authors site. Here it is mywriterscircle.com
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Post by bloodwolf on Oct 10, 2006 14:52:14 GMT -5
I'm glad you are I need some critique. Well this story has hit a bad delay, but I have up to chapter 10 done. Anyways here's five.
chapter five "Miles look upon this beautiful place." The mysterious man told Miles gesturing toward Miles future home, his wife, and the two young children. " This wonderful place, a loving family, and a beautiful wife. This can all be yours." Said the man to Miles his voice making all these wonderful things sound even better.
" Can?" said Miles confused " That means I am not supposed to have this life?" the man then replied " It is not the life that is intended to be yours, but should you drop your quest of redemption you can have this life."
"This life wasn't intended for me. I shouldn't mess with the natural course of the universe." Thought the young Prower to himself. "But this life is soo perfect and I have the power to take it for my own." Argued Miles with himself
" What if there is some great problem because of my choice. What if it causes others pain and suffering? Can I really do that to all those people?" continued Miles Then his eyes gazed upon the beauty of the female fox. " What if I lose her?" " What if I cause her suffering and pain?"
Arguments were flying left and right through the young foxes mind some urging him to take the life offered to him others to let the world take its natural course. Finally Miles looks up at A " I’m sorry but I can’t drop my quest. I should let destiny run its course. I have no right to bend it for my own sake" the mysterious man looked at Miles and said "So be it."
As the man said this the forest began to fade and in its place came an a swirl of changing lights things and an incessant ringing in his ear. The lights began Spiraling around the fox and A faster and faster as the became Dizier and dizier. Things were blurring in and out of focus Then it all stopped.
What he saw amazed him beyond his wildest dreams. The thing he first set his eyes upon was the clearness in the air and the cloudless blue sky of a summer afternoon better than he had seen in years. He then saw rows of building lined across both sides of the small highway. Magnificent things they were as he thought to himself a museum of great and very important beings, a restaurant of very fine quality, a store where people of old and young could buy souvenirs of this place which he assumed was Westropolis. Then he saw something he missed, a statue in the middle of two highways which looked like the centerpiece of the whole place. Red roses decorated around it in a circle as a great sign of someone or something important. The marble platform had a gold plate with an inscription he could not yet see.
He moved closer as he was looking. He saw the rock statue and his eyes couldn’t believe themselves for he saw himself. He now was close enough to read the inscription but he was studying the rock figure of himself. His eyes in the statue were gazing toward the sky, his right hand was clenched reaching toward the sky as if he was trying to grab the sky. His left hand was clenched at his side. A cocky smile at his mouth was the most interesting thing about the statue. Miles continued to linger on the face of the statue for a few more minutes then read the inscription. It said: Tails hero of Mobius. Our Savior, Our Friend, and Our Greatest Ally. You shall not be forgotten. "Look upon these things young fox. Your world has been redeemed and its evils gone, but look upon the woman you loved and see the sadness in her heart" the man gestured towards the teacher of a small group of children and Miles could see the tears in her eyes and could feel the sadness that dwelt within her. " Look upon your monument and know t hat your fate is death." the man said unto the fox. The way the word death rolled of A's tongue froze Miles. He didn't want to die and he definently didn't want to cause his love such sadness as he now saw upon her face. Then he thought about the inscription on the monument "Tails hero of Mobius. Our savior, our friend, and our greatest ally." He couldn't let all those people down he just couldn’t. He had already let enough people down as it was and he wasn't about to let all of Mobius suffer for his own personal gain. "Im sorry but even though I see such sadness in you this is the path I have chosen. Please forgive me for letting you down" Miles whispered to the Girl. Then to his suprize she lifted her head as if she had heard a ghost and soft whispered "Tails?". "I cant abandon my quest there are too many people depending on me" The mysterious man then teleports them again.
This time they stood in the middle of a terribly rugged landscape with no building around as far as they can see people are dead and dying while the survivors fight for their lives, homes, and families. everything has a crimson tint to it from the blood that covers the ground. the horrible scene is worse than anything miles has ever seen he knows it is for a good reason though and that it will come if he continues onward. he then spots himself amongst the blood and bodies and cruelties of war. he is covered in blood although only a little is his own. standing next to him is the woman he had seen in the other visions She was also covered in blood although not a drop was her own. Standing above them was a large creature that Miles could not make out and in his hand was a large red orb. The creature dropped the orb and just before it hit the ground Miles felt a presence, but as soon as the presence had come it had gone. Miles then watched himself jump back avoiding the orb. As the orb finally hit the ground it expanded in waves of red electricity. As the waves finally died down he saw that the girl was completely gone not so much as a single remnet of her was left and Miles became sick to his stomach he wanted to fall over and throw up, but he couldn't he had to see this to the end. Then another thing came over him. Rage he wanted to kill the mysterious man who had destroyed his love. Then Miles saw that the version of him living the battle was becoming encircled with a mass field of flashing flames that were so bright the fox had to cover his eyes. Then as the flames died down Tails saw that the miles from the vision was now wearing a red cape and red gloves and he recognized it as his Turbo form. everything went faster in a seconds time and time had passed and miles knew it. miles is horrified by the fact he is dying wishing to keep himself to live but knowing he cannot droops his head slightly but again looks at his blood covered dying self with now rage and misty eyes No longer able to bear the site of himself Miles turns his head away. As he does his eyes lock onto the body of the mysterious creature that laid on the ground also vanquished and as Miles looked upon him he realized that it was all over the battle had been won. Then Miles hears himself and quickly turns back to see himself alive, but struggling to stay awake. Then A tear rolls down the Mile's eye as hears himself say "I failed you Im sorry I shouldn't have let that happen to you. Please Forgive me." Then the vision of him turns his head and dies and closes his eyes for th final time. After the vision of Miles died time shifted forward again and standing above his cold lifeless body was the girl from both visions. Her eyes were red and swollen with tears and her fists clenched so tightly together that her fingernails punctured her palms causing more blood to trickle down to the the ground. She fell to her knees and shouted "Tails, how could you how could you. I loved you and you left me." She was crying and beating on his chest. Then her
eyes dropped and she laid her head on his chest and whispered "I loved you Tails. Why did you have to go?" Time skips shifts forward one last time and he sees two figures walk over to his body. As he sees them he feels that same familiarity that he felt when the creature dropped the red orb. He feels as though he knows them, but he cant remember who they are. Both stop and look at his body and then the first one says "" You won little buddy. It took all you had but you did it. I really owe you one this time." At that a tear fell down the face of the mysterious figure. Then the other one began to laugh and he said " About time the fox died I was getting tired of him." the mysterious man then tells Miles " if you go and fight alongside the others you will die, but this death is much worse you will die in believing that you have failed the woman you loved most. You will die thinking you are a failure. You will die a death that never ends young Prower a death no one deserves." The thought of a never ending death chills the young fox. Even the site if the battleground makes Miles want to give up his quest, but again he thinks about all the people he has counting on him and all the lives he has saved. He knows that this is something he must do so he says" for my friends and love I would except such a fate." The man looks at miles and says "So be it." then everything went black and the fox opened his eyes and standing above him was Pyro the fox.
(Pyro description is given in chapter6)
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Post by bloodwolf on Nov 22, 2006 15:23:18 GMT -5
( my bad in chap 7 anyways.)
"så begynner daggryet av den to tailed rev" mutters the small yellow fox in the black cloak as he sits silently next to the tree stump that grants access to the base of the freedom fighters. He is somewhat mesmerized by the beauty and radiance the stars were giving off on this cool perfect night. It even seemed as if the trees of the forest had moved themselves aside just so he could look upon the stars.
As he sat there, Sally emerged from the entrance and sat beside of the fox. She had no idea who he was, but since Antoine had trusted him Sally decided she might as well get acquainted with the fox. Sally sat silently by the fox for a moment as she too was caught up in the beauty of the stars. After a few moments she said to the fox "It's beautiful, isn't it?" The fox hadn't even realized she had been standing there the whole time and jumped a little the recovered saying “yes it is a wonderful site.” There is a small silence between them as they stare at the sky for a little longer. Then Sally breaks the silence turning to face the fox saying, “I am Sally. It is a pleasure to meet you." "What is your name if I many ask? I am. Afraid Antoine hasn’t told me it yet." The fox ignores the question and continues to look upon the stars. Sally quickly catches onto the fact he doesn't wish to reveal his name. Sally then asks a new question " Where is it you are from?" The fox acknowledges the question this time and answers saying " I am from somewhere no one needs or deserves to be." Sally thinks to herself trying to imagine such a place, but nothing comes to mind and she decides to change the subject. So far the conversation had gotten Sally nowhere, but she wasn't one to so easily give up. So she decided to ask another question. " So what brings you to Mobius?" Again he acknowledges the question and replies " My business is my own." His tone showing he was annoyed with her questions. So Sally just decided to sit back and enjoy the view cause talking with the fox was getting her absolutely nowhere. The stars were shining so brightly to her they seemed like they were trying to outshine the moon and sun but sadly they were dimmer all though they tried. The moon was a crescent shining the brightest of all, lighting dark corners the stars could reach. The stars seemed like the freedom fighters all trying to strive harder than the others, but the moon was their leader in respects doing the best of all. Whom it represented Sally knew not. She sighed wishing she knew who it was and also the sigh knowing that their leader use to be sonic but his star was dim now and she lowered her head with respect and grief.
The fox could see the depression in her eyes and the sadness in her sigh. He knew something was troubling her. It wasn't just her though everyone who was part of the freedom fighters seemed to greatly upset about something. He decided it was not his business although he was very curious as to what could cause such depression amongst the group. He took his view back to the stars and looked upon them then he silently he uttered the phrase "Jeg finner De min kjærlighet" then he sighed.
As both Sally and the fox were sitting looking upon the stars Antoine emerges from the entrance to the base. He confronts them both saying " It's getting late you two should head inside." Sally gets up and heads back inside. The fox looks at Antoine and says " What is it you wish to speak with me about?” Antoine sighs " You remember Sonic do you not." The fox thinks for a moment though he knew exactly who Sonic was and said " I believe so why?" Antoine then began to tell the fox about the incident and how Sonic was no longer among the living. The fox took this all in well, but once Antoine revealed that Miles had been the one that dealt this fate to the hedgehog that is when the shock came. "Wait you mean the kitsune killed Sonic." Antoine looked upon him and said simply "Yes" Then the fox looked upon Antoine and said " Then you know what must be done." Antoine was hesitant, but eventually said " Yes I am afraid I know what must be done."
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Post by viviroxmysox on Nov 22, 2006 19:38:44 GMT -5
not enough gay sex
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Post by bloodwolf on Nov 22, 2006 20:41:43 GMT -5
( umm... this story most likely won't have gay sex of any sort... but this isn't the only work I'll ever write so who knows.)
As Miles awoke his memory of traveling time was gone looks upon the three tailed black and red fox that stood above him known as Pyro the fox. The fox wore black gloves and red shoes besides that he had no other article of clothing. The smirk on Pyro's face was something beyond confident and the look on his face let miles know that he better be ready for a fight.
Miles clenched his fist and leapt into a standing position as a stern frown crossed his face. Pyro didn't even waste his time with talk or banter, but rather immediately charged at Miles. Quickly miles side-stepped the charge and went to elbow Pyro, but Pyro quickly dodged the attack and sent his right leg flying at Miles with immense force, Miles dropped quickly avoiding the attack. Then Pyro removed his pistol. Miles didn't waste any time he quickly took off in the air spinning his Tails as fast as they could go. Pyro wasn't far behind firing his gun. After eight shots the fox quickly reloaded and began shooting once more again Miles began swerving left and right avoiding the bullets. After a moment Pyro then reloaded his gun once more and took aim. He fired of a shot that hit Miles right in his left shoulder. Ignoring the pain Miles continued on trying to outrun the fox who was chasing him. As he flew a small trail of blood floated to the ground behind him. Though he wasn't concerned with that. His only concern was ditching Pyro. Pyro was right on his trail and gaining speed. Miles didn't know what to do Pyro was going to catch up with him and that wasn't a good thing. Pyro went to reload again only to find he had ran out of ammunition for his gun. He immediately removed a lighter from his pocket and lit it. Then slowly the flame from the lighter lifted up and began to fly after Miles. Miles dodged the wave of flame, but Pyro sent the flame after Miles a second time miles again dodged it. About this time Miles Tails were getting tired. He slowly began losing speed. Then finally he could no longer lift himself and began to fall. Pyro seized the opportunity and sent his wave of flame towards Miles making a direct hit across the face. Miles then began to plummet towards the earth and landed with an immense crash. Pyro lands nearby and advances upon the fallen Miles. Miles tries to stand but the landing had knocked the breath out of him. He tried to regain his strength ad breath but time was of the essence and he had so little of it. Slowly he raised himself to his feet and faced Pyro, he would not die lying down but he would die trying to fight. Bruised and bleeding he waited for his breathing to slow. He knew he couldn’t run because he was too tired for that and didn’t have the strength yet. Pyro laughs as he watches the fox re-enter his fighting stance.
He quickly begins to go in for his kill when suddenly he hears "Blir revengelske mil ikke dør I dag. " As his ears caught this he became paralyzed. His body is without motion. He tries with all his strength to move, but it is of no avail. Then A small yellow fox wearing a black cloak steps forth from the shadows. He looks at Pyro and then passes him silently. He approaches Miles and says to him “Go now Prower. The paralysis is only temporary tis your only time to escape." Miles headed what the fox said and limped off seeming how walking was still beyond his ability to do.
As miles took off the fox approached Pyro and told him " I do not wish the fox to die. I paid you to bring him to the freedom fighters alive."Pyro regains movement and says to the yellow fox " Very well then I shall bring the fox to you alive although I don't understand why you want him to remain breathing." Both walk their own separate ways. Pyro walks opposite of Miles and the yellow fox heads back to the freedom fighters base.
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Post by S-wo on Nov 23, 2006 0:03:57 GMT -5
My reply to Chapter 5: this chapter for me, or maybe it's just in the situatuion when I read it ( meaning I wasn't relaxed or comfortable) but this chapter seemed a lot harder for me to comprehend on what's going on, alot seems to be jumbled up together. Like a lot of times you mix dialogue and narrating in the same paragraph, Note whenever a new person speaks or when that person is finished start a new paragraph. That's really my only problem though. I had the same problem when I first wrote Nick's Chapter 1 The Panic three years ago I might have to re-read over that one again and modify it.
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Post by bloodwolf on Nov 23, 2006 0:23:04 GMT -5
Yeah I see what you mean I'll have to edit that once I get the chance!
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Post by blackparade on Nov 23, 2006 14:57:14 GMT -5
It's a nice story but it definitely needs more gay sex scenes. Phallus forever!
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Post by bloodwolf on Nov 23, 2006 16:57:53 GMT -5
well thanks, but this isn't gonna have gay sex in it.
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